The richest and most fertile soil for growth is the encounter between what we know how to do and what we don’t know how to do.

If we look at this statement through the lens of learning itself we will see that what he is really describing is the intersection between conscious competency (knowing what we know) and conscious incompetency (knowing what we don’t know).

Herein lies the conflict.

The bulk of learning occurs between these two stages and it’s also the most uncomfortable and the most unsettling.  As these two stages collide there is a natural tendency to attempt to gain control and thereby avoid the awkwardness of not knowing.

When we are faced with our incompetence it can be embarrassing—no one likes to look like a buffoon.

I remember the first time my business mentor and coach, Michael Port, asked me to recite the overview of the entire Book Yourself Solid system in front of a group of my peers.  My heart started to race, my armpits started to sweat and everything went blank. I don’t think I could even recite my name let alone the marketing system. I wanted to run for the hills. I knew the material, but I had zero experience presenting it in front of a group.

There’s the intersection. I could have said, “I’m going to pass” or I could choose to accept the invitation to grow and practice despite my clumsiness. I accepted. It wasn’t perfect, but I grew—all because I said yes and I was willing to cross the threshold of not knowing.

The temptation to retreat from the discomfort or somehow delay the clumsy and awkward stage of learning in order to gain control will always be there. However, to lessen the discomfort and seek control will only delay or sabotage learning and growth itself.

The challenge then is to recognize the process of learning for what it is and embrace it! Embrace the sweaty armpits and the rapid heart rate. You will get through it.

When you move from resistance to acceptance you are able to bridle a sizeable momentum that will carry you forward. The by-product is growth. The reward is triumph!

To what extent are you resisting change for the sake of comfort?

I watch reality TV because it is a way for my brain to turn off from the strategic and financial issues that I handle every day. If I had more time, I might have convinced him that it would be a good idea to watch more reality TV.  Instead, I will try to convince you. 

There are some people that are never going to connect with the idea of watching reality TV – my uncle Frank is one of those people.  He has not owned a TV for 40 years. For everyone else…keep reading.

Grow Your Business

I know it sounds crazy that watching TV can help you grow your business.  Shouldn’t you be out there going to networking events, calling prospects on the phone, sending out e-mail marketing, writing a new blog post?

Yes, but not until you have chosen a target market.  Your marketing efforts will be much more successful if you know who you are marketing to.  If your target market is neurosurgeons in New York, your message may be much different than if your target market is Zumba instructors in California.  Not to mention the networking events you attend, prospects that you call, e-mails that you send, and blog posts that you write will be different.  Defining a target market is one of the best ways to get more clients.

Reality TV can help you define your interests.  You might think you want to become a boat captain because you like taking your canoe out on the lake, but after watching the Deadliest Catch and watching the captains risk their lives and the lives of their crew every day, you might think otherwise.  Or you might want to start a bakery because you love to bake, or a restaurant because you love to cook – Hell’s Kitchen, Restaurant Nightmares, Bar Rescue, Cake Boss, DC Cupcake, Cupcake Wars can give you inspiration (if you aren’t feeling inspired – maybe that is a sign that this is not your destiny).  Defining your interests can either determine what you want to do or who you might want to help.  I love watching the aforementioned shows, and I’ve already owned a restaurant, so I chose to target new restaurants for my marketing. There are so many interest specific shows such as American Chopper, Project Runway, Pawn Stars, NY Ink, and Top Shot, that you are sure to be able to find one that can help you define what you love so that you can do work that interests and inspires you.

It Helps Keep You Young

Sitting around watching TV is not going to extend your life or reduce wrinkles.  But it will help you feel younger if you can relate to the kids in your life. You might just be able to decode what they are saying.

Do you know what “obvi,” “GTL,” or “a blowout” is?  “Obvi” is an abbreviation for obvious that is used frequently by Snooki on the Jersey Shore, “GTL” stands for Gym, Tanning, Laundry, and “a blowout” is when a guy blow dries his hair to stand up straight like Pauly D on Jersey Shore. And yes, Jersey Shore is a ridiculous show, but it is so stupid it’s funny.  What better way is there to keep you feeling young than with the medicine of laughter?

Feel Better About Your Life and Have Hope

Let’s face it, sometimes when others are in a worse situation than you are, it makes you feel better.  If you got fired from your job and are struggling to pay the bills, you might be down in the dumps, but at least you aren’t living in one.  That is what shows like Hoarders and Intervention are good for. I always watch Hoarders when I need to clean the house. I might be feeling down about being a less than stellar housekeeper, or about my mom’s latest joke “if Sarah could clean her house with a spreadsheet, her place would be immaculate”, but nothing motivates me more than thinking I might end up like that if I don’t get off my butt and clean.

Do we feel bad for people that are suffering from these afflictions?  Of course we do. Sometimes it is even with a sense of awe that I watch the hell that people put themselves through, like how can that mom of 3 lose her kids and smoke crack every day?

But these shows also offer hope, there is recovery from the mental issues that plague a hoarder, there is recovery from addiction.

And after all doesn’t this make us feel better?  All you have to do is get more clients for this business, this mountain of a challenge diminishes when compared to what some people are facing.  For whatever you are currently facing, you can persevere because you know that there is hope.

To start out in a simple manner, make sure you know the following:

Determine exactly:

1. Your target market
2. Your product or service
3. Your marketing plan
4. Your financial goal
5. Your action plan

To determine your target market, it is best to go back to the questions that help you to identify it. Ask yourself the following: Who do you intend to serve? Has your market changed? Is there something new that they need? Looking at your target market with a fresh pair of eyes allows you to know what is going on with them in the present moment.

Next, look at your products and services. What do you intend to give in return for the money you desire? Do you have a unique ability that people are looking for? Have you added to your skills set? Can you broaden what you offer to your target market? These questions help you to look at what your target market needs and they help you to look at yourself to see what else you can offer.

Then, create a new marketing plan. While you are creating your marketing plan, ask yourself these questions: What will you say to get people to notice you? How will you get the word out? Is there a new way you can get out in front of the public eye and remain top of mind? Who do you need to keep in touch with? What new people do you need to meet? You may need to network in new places or new ways. You may also partner with someone who can help you move outside of your comfort zone.

Now that you’ve determined your target market’s needs, you’ve looked at your products and services and you’ve created a marketing plan, it’s time to revisit your financial goal. How much money do you desire to make? Are you spending your time doing things that don’t generate income? Is it more efficient to hire a reliable professional?

Finally, create your action plan. What actions will you take to accomplish your goals? What steps do you need to take? What is the date for each step? Setting a date for each task keeps you on track for making your goals happen instead of merely hoping you will remember to get around to them to make them happen.

By asking yourself these questions, you will remain in the driver seat for meeting your business goals and objectives. As in nature, your business cannot be permitted to become stagnant or it will wither and become compost. By staying grounded in the present, you will stay connected to your business and your business will thrive and stay fresh while providing successful blooms of prosperity for years to come.

First, embrace the concept of “Pareto’s Law.” This Italian economist discovered the “80-20 Rule”: that is, 80 percent of your results come from 20% of what you do. 

In sports, 20 percent of the athletes produce 80 percent of the results on the field or court (yards, points, goals, etc.). In business, 20 percent of your clients will provide you with 80 percent of your revenue. In sales and marketing, 20 percent of your efforts will get you that 80 percent of customers.  That other 80 percent, of course, gets you ever closer to that elusive moment when your produce “100 percent effort.” That could mean your best sale, program, or business condition.

I always recommend that professionals attend to this 20 percent early in the sales and marketing of their professional business. It can be summarized in a simple question: if, for some reason, you could only do sales and marketing 90 minutes a week (three sessions of 30 minutes), what would you do? Allocating this limited time is the key to successful marketing for a busy working professional.

Would you spend a lot of time on social media? Study search engine optimization? Attend business card exchanges? Well, then, what?

As a professional speaker and coach, I answered this question with a strategy for the appropriate application of the Book Yourself Solid Seven Core Self-Promotion Strategies. But, only after I had built a solid foundation and knew how to build trust and credibility within my target market. I could easily hold “80 percent” on that schedule.

So, what are your goals? As an independent professional, what would you do in those 90 minutes? I might alternate, keeping in touch, writing, meeting new people, or asking for referrals through those 30 minute sessions. What about this or that or this: yes, they are important…but I only have a few minutes!

So, the busy working professional has to take the long-term goal and run it into the the 90 minute question first. Whatever answer arises…is the beginning point of the solution to the quandary of being a full-time person and a full-time professional.

Let me know what you think in the comments below.

             The sink is full of dishes; the kitchen is a mess,

Emails keep buzzing; the phone won’t take a rest,

The kids won’t behave and hubby is having a moody day

Sitting at my desk but feel the need to sway!

My desk is overloaded with nothing I need,

I’m trying to keep up with tasks at speed,

This one, that one, which one first,

I don’t even get time to quench my thirst,

There’s a knock at the door, who can that be?

Doesn’t working from home mean WORKING from home?

I don’t have time for a cup of tea,

Please let me be, please let me be

Overwhelm is an emotion, it comes in many forms,

Anger, frustration and causes a storm,

Don’t blame others for the missing link,

Completing the work will get you back in sync.

Give yourself care and allow your brain to rest,

Sometimes we forget we need to refresh,

Break it all down to smaller chunks,

Learn serenity as do the monks,

Let me give you a little tip, just sway to the right and walk out the door!

If you feel guilty accepting money for your services, let’s see if we can get to the core of it. You love what you offer your clients and enjoy your craft but there is a conflict within you when accepting payment for those services or products. Could this be the number one reason that many service professionals treat their businesses more like a hobby than a professional career?

Where do your beliefs about creating wealth come from? Let’s face it; there was a time when a generation of us was being told you HAVE to work hard to get anywhere. If you want to be someone, expect to work for it. However, a hobby is usually where the joy is. So, I ask you this, are you thinking you do not want to turn what you love into your work because somehow your creative genius and passion to serve will disappear? You need to accept that while there is a lot of money spent on hobbies, it is businesses that make money. So, can you have both? The answer is no. You need to give your respect to your business as a money making venture or you will end up on a hobby roller coaster ride to nowhere. This is your business and its success lies in honoring your creative genius. You have decided to serve others because it is what you enjoy and that is amazing. You serve, therefore you deserve.

A way to begin the process of transitioning your thinking would be to take a really good look at the powerful benefits you offer your clients. What is it that you, your core service, or the product you offer, provide as a BIG result for your client?

• Does this make your client’s life easier?
• Does it make your clients happier?
• It may even save your client money in some aspect.

Take some time and write down what it is about yourself and your services that creates a benefit to the lives of your clients.What is your process of educating your clients on these amazing benefits you offer? When you educate your clients one-by-one, you reveal with heart-centered honesty why you are in their lives. Educating your clients in a sincere way to communicate on all the benefits you offer them is key and is in itself a beautiful way to extend service to others. It prevents you from ever having a sales driven conversation. This is generally why so many heart-centered service professionals struggle with the transaction of accepting payment for their amazing services. Free yourself by educating your clients on the amazing benefits you so generously provide.

We have identified old beliefs that no longer provide your business with what it really deserves in order to have tremendous success. We have also discovered the importance of a core philosophy that educates your clients on the main benefits you offer to their lives as it allows you, the humble service professional, to circumnavigate away from the fast talking sales conversation.

This is the mind map to end all mind maps. It’s so big that turning it into a PDF or a JPEG compromises the quality of it and, frankly, just looks crappy.

So that you can have the full enchilada, I’ve put the source file here for you to download. However, in order to view it, you’ll need a mind map program called, Xmind, which you can download for free here.

Enjoy. Please share. It’s how we help our friends think bigger about who they are and what they offer the world.

UPDATE:  If the file is zipped when you download it, try renaming it with the “.xmind” extension. (Hat tip to Peter for that one.)

You like almost every entrepreneur, service professional and small business owner have a big vision for how you will uniquely impact and transform your clients and marketplace. Sweet.

You want, no, NEED to be fully self-expressed. You need to know that the very essence of who you are has made the difference in a way that nobody else can. Exciting, right?

But there’s a problem.

The quest for self-expression often inadvertently leads to self-absorption. This is not intentional, of course, but can be so insidious that without realizing it, your dream and vision can turn into a nightmare of frustration, paralysis and crushed confidence. This is not a fun place to be.

How does this happen?

1. By trying too hard to be unique and independent, you lose focus of what others need and become isolated instead.
2. By thinking that the only way to be truly self-expressed, you must create 100% original intellectual property (i.e, your own system for solving your client’s particular problems). This is not easy and requires lots of time. Time you usually don’t have when you should be attracting more clients instead.
3. The struggle to create awareness with limited time and increased frustration perpetuates a vicious cycle of disappointment and poor results.

Be self-expressed AND booked solid!

Ready to break the cycle and realize just how groovy it is to have all of the ideal clients you want while being 100% YOU?

The formula is simple but it’s definitely not easy. It requires your focused dedication. Your dreams are worth that, aren’t they?

1. Embrace and leverage the power of a network. I’m not referring to the cheesy networking concept of “card pushing.” Instead, as we teach in Book Yourself Solid, identify the top 20 influential people in your market and connect with them. See what you can do for them and you might be amazed at the results. Also make a point to connect a lot more with your peers, the people you know you can probably help and who might help you too.
2. Don’t try to reinvent the wheel. Study, tap into and connect with what’s already out there and working. It’s much easier to develop your own intellectual property when you have the revenue to pay your bills. Obviously, you don’t want to rip off someone else’s work. There are great options like certifications, licensing and franchising that allow you to use an existing, successful system.
3. Develop your unique perspective and one-of-a-kind systems while you are building your business and increasing your revenue using, proven, successful systems and strategies.

If you follow these steps you really can be fully self-expressed while avoiding the gloomy place called self-absorption.

Others who are doing it!

As the Director of Coach Development for The Book Yourself Solid School of Coach Training, I get to interact, coach and work with some of the most amazing people around…the Book Yourself Solid Coaches in Training.

I would like to introduce you to some of our newly certified coaches! Each is uniquely expressing themselves as they bring their life experience and individual swagger to their Book Yourself Solid coaching business.

Chantal Debrosse  Chantal is passionate about helping highly motivated small business owners who are on the brink of overwhelm to gain clarity in order to get more ideal clients, more money, and more time.

Ana Melikian  Ana is founder of AMAZE Coaching, she works with coaches and consultants who have great ideas and services, but are overwhelmed with online marketing and technology. She assists them to get unstuck from the technology quicksand so they can get more clients and increase their income.

Tracy Burrows Tracy is passionate about helping service professionals get more clients. Every successful business must start with a rock solid foundation and Tracy uses the Book Yourself Solid marketing system to help her clients achieve this.

Hope Bockus Hope wants to see massage therapists utilize their talent while teaching them to get more clients than they can even handle.

Shawn Dill Shawn helps strong, philosophical chiropractors find success so that they can touch more lives, educate the sick about true health care and serve our profession by proving that chiropractors CAN make a tremendous living without selling out the principle.

Francine Graglia Francine helps service professionals get more clients…even if they cringe at the thought of marketing and selling.

Andrei Jablokow  Andrei is passionate about helping service professionals get more clients. When you’re done working with Andrei not only will you have a sustainable and repeatable marketing system that works, you will also enjoy marketing and selling.

Jim McNerney Jim helps Wellness Coaches to transform their businesses to peak health and themselves to being fully self-expressed. He will help you avoid the years of struggle and wheel spinning that he went through and achieve your booked solid business vision.

Peter Watz Peter shares his dynamic +20 year sales career reflecting pioneering experience and great performance in the computer and Internet industries. He remains on the cutting-edge, driving new business through key accounts and establishing strategic partnerships and dealer relationships to increase channel revenue. Peter lives in Sweden.

Sarah Thompson Sarah helps people start successful small businesses by writing their business plans and by helping them get more customers by using the Book Yourself Solid System. She has over fifteen years of experience in financial modeling, corporate finance, operations and human resource management of small and medium sized businesses.

Jamie McKean Jamie is a business coach, business mentor and business consultant, not afraid to get stuck in to get great results for clients who want to change but don’t know where to start. Also a published author who’s appeared on TV, but most proud of his beautiful daughters and very patient wife.

Congratulations on all of your hard work! You are well prepared to do big things helping others transform their lives and businesses. 

For the rest of you, who do you serve and what do you help them do? When you know that, you can choose to be fully self-expressed in your desire to, as Michael says, “Stand in the service of others, as you stand in the service of your destiny.” Go for it and go big!

In this video I walk you through how to set up a simple automated sales and admin process so that your customer is well served and super satisfied. It’ll also help you reduce waste and work less.

Resources used and introduced in the video:

Infusionsoft – all in one sales & marketing software
Xmind – brainstorming & mind mapping software

The Little-Known Secret of Big, Bold Personal Branding

You can’t buy it and you can’t download it. But it is one of the most crucial elements to building a successful brand.

You know what I’m talking about, don’t you? That’s right—I’m talking about Confidence with a capital C.

Believing in your self isn’t just a cliché. It’s serious business.

Your results (or lack-thereof) are determined by what you believe to be your capacity for doing big things, as Michael would say.

I’ve struggled with self-confidence in my life. I tried to get the little voice in my head to tell me I could achieve my goals but all I could think of was , “What if the little voice in my head is an idiot?” As you might imagine, this had a big impact on my ability to actually achieve my goals. If that’s not a catch 22, I don’t know what is.

Waiting for Approval is Wasteful

My time was spent (and by spent I mean wasted) waiting for approval. I was putting my business on-hold while I waited for someone to show up and tell me my ideas were worthwhile.

I was afraid to put my message out there. I held myself back and as a result I was broke. Not just financially but also (and maybe more importantly) mentally.  Have you been there? Are you there now?

Until I kicked this little, insipid, senseless, seriously stupid voice to the curb, my business struggled.

Why is self-belief so important to your brand and business? It’s simple. If you have doubt, so will your customers.

Confidence is Contagious

Do you want to do business with someone that lacks confidence in themself and their services? That’s a rhetorical question, of course.

People can sense desperation and insecurities in a heart-beat. You have to be confident in what you do. You must honestly believe that you are the best option for your ideal client. As Michael says, you have to be able to declare, “The best thing for you would be me.” No one is going to respect your opinions if you can’t say that (or at least think it).

Is it hard to build your confidence? Sure, maybe sometimes. But this is YOUR LIFE we’re talking about? It is worth it to work on this? It’s imperative. To dodge doing so demonstrates a lack of integrity.

Moreover, if you have limiting beliefs and self doubt then you hold yourself back when it comes to promoting your products and services. Being timid isn’t going to put your brand atop of the food chain. When you lack confidence you lack the courage to try new and innovative ideas; ideas that can propel your business—and your life—forward.

People gravitate towards brands that stand for something. Someone they can get behind and support. Something they feel they are a part of. This is why you must have an unwavering belief in what you stand for and full confidence in how you express yourself. This is how you’ll make your name in the world.

Passion, like confidence, is contagious. When you express yourself in a passionate way people gravitate to you. Passion creates an emotional connection. Once people connect to your brand emotionally, you’ve got it made. This is why anything holding you back from delivering your message to the world should be eliminated immediately. There’s no room for self-doubt in business.

Cockiness vs. Confidence

Now, let me stress that there is a difference between confidence and cockiness. Confidence is sexy. Cockiness is a turn-off. Believing in the value you bring to the table is respectable whereas a foolish, hyperbolic grandiose sense of self is arrogant.

People are attracted to confidence. Believe in yourself and the value you bring to the table. If you don’t, then you’ll always play the game too small.

The world needs you to play big. You owe it to yourself and to those you can help.

Take a moment to leave a reply that helps others increase their confidence. Maybe you have a story about becoming more confident over the years? Or maybe you can share some of your fears and doubts along with your desire to strengthen your resolve and secure your sense of self?